A Death-Rebirth Dream

I don’t normally do this–share details about personal experience, particularly of a spiritual nature–but last night I had a very powerful experience through the medium of my dream.  I have been struggling for a few weeks now sleeping regularly.  Bouts of insomnia, stress, disturbing sometimes graphic and horrifying nightmares.  This is very odd for me–normally I hit the pillow lights out and I sleep like a baby.

Over the weeks I have been increasingly praying the prayer from The Book of Common Prayer’s Compline service (the final prayers of the evening) which petition the Lord to send the angels to guard this house from the “terrors of the night.”

Last night I had a dream that I was killed.  I watched myself die.  Technically I was murdered (shot) but the imagery was not particularly violent or bloody.  More cartoon-y almost in a sense.  I was shot and then fell back into a cavernous swimming pool.  It was almost more like a lake within a cave (double womb/death imagery).  I watched myself fall endlessly through the crystal blue water.  At this point in the dream, my proximate self-sense was the Witness, the observer of my-self, (my distal self) which in this case was my idealized-emotional-subtle-dream self.  I watched that self plummet gracefully through the water and simply relaxed into the process of watching myself die.

At some point in this process, I became lucid (aware of being one was dreaming).  I then re-entered the perspective of my now dead subtle-dream self and immediately re-awoke and was jolted up through the water (rebirth-resurrection theme).  I maintained both the awareness of being in a dream while simultaneously taking up the position of the subtle-self.  i.e. I made choices, felt the expression of my emotional-subtle self.

Upon waking from that dream, I could feel a definite release of bodily and emotional contractions, especially in my chest.  I really have no idea what was going on through this process–nor now with some (partial?) resolution.

Published in: on January 19, 2009 at 7:30 pm  Comments (3)  

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  1. Do you think that this is an alternative path to lucid dreaming in that you’re rewiring your brain for these first/second/third person perspectives *consciously* (whereas most lucid dreaming techniques that I’m aware of revolve around teaching the ability to identify that the person is in the dream through dream journals &c.)?

  2. I hadn’t made that connection, but that’s an interesting hypothesis. Maybe if you try it and then you similarly have some lucid dreaming, we may be onto something. Speaking in my own experience, having a journal next to the bed and writing down imagery does make me remember more and more in dreams and have more intense ones. The trick is to begin to notice patterns and for me funny things that clearly don’t belong are the key to waking up in the dream. e.g. I often have celebrities in my dreams (which is really weird because I’m not some TV Star subscriber or watch Oprah or stuff like that). So the second a celeb is in a dream–like for some reason I had this recurring dream for awhile where I would get on an elevator and Jack Nicholson was there????–then pow I realize I’m dreaming and then I can laugh and ease into the lucidity.

    Another one I’ve done on occasion is consciously entered in meditation while lucid in the dream. It helps I find move me towards lucidity in deep dreamless sleep.

  3. What you’re saying about celebs sounds very similar to what little I have heard about lucid dreaming in that the dreamer has to identify their “key” or celebrity in your case and then they use that to trigger into lucid mode.

    As re: integral calculus and lucid dreaming; I want to grok mathematical calculus before I start trying to take the derivatives of my own states of consciousness. Not to mention that I rarely remember my dreams and remembering dreams correlates to poor sleep quality with me, so I’ve never been particularly interested in experiencing lucid dreams. I do enjoy reading about them, though.

    Pursue this! You could be the author of a new lucid dreaming technique if it pans out.

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